The Phone Call

Driving home from my moms house in Meridian, Ms, after celebrating Christmas 2020, was the night my life took a drastic turn, again! I had texted my husband around noon saying I would be a few hours later than I thought so I would be coming home around 4:00 pm instead of 2:00 pm. Mom and I were enjoying some much needed girl time! He said “take your time”. Ten minutes from home, he called saying he was pulling out out of the driveway going to get something to eat. I was confused and felt so sad. Why would he be leaving as I am one exit away?

He asked me if I wanted him to wait. Everything in me was feeling confused? How would he not wait anyway? Why would he need to ask if I wanted him to wait after 25 years of marriage? Why wouldn’t he have just called ten minutes earlier and said “do you want to go eat with me when you get here?” “YES! I’m starving and have lots to talk about!” Thats not what I said. Funny how just one different conversation could have led me down a different road.

My response was no. Go ahead and do whatever you were headed to do. I didn’t want to “invite myself” along for whatever was so important to pull out as I’m about to pull in. We texted a few times and agreed that I would “meet him” in a little while. But the more I thought about being left, I texted him saying “I think you must need some Ken time if you’re leaving as I’m arriving. I’ll just eat something here.” He said ok

1. What did I learn?

2. How could I have reacted differently?

3. Have you ever been in a conversation where your actions said one thing, but your heart said something different?

I learned that when I feel rejected or hurt, I withdraw. I am unable to communicate things “you should already know” or that seem like common sense issues.

When he said” I’m going to eat and didn’t know if you were hungry. Do you want me to wait?” I could have said “Yes, I am hungry. Just wait.”

My actions said go ahead and I’ll see you later. My head said no way I’m driving to meet a man that couldn’t wait a few minutes to see if I wanted to go eat.

Discussion:

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